The Difference Between Loving Someone and Being in Love With Them:
In the world there are many types of relationships. There are romantic ones, friendship ones, family ones, business partnerships etc. But all these relationships have one thing in common – they require two parties to agree upon something before it becomes a valid relationship. You cannot just decide to fall in love with someone without any kind of agreement or understanding beforehand.
When two people get into a relationship, they usually need to make some sort of commitment first. They might even feel guilty if they don’t do so. When you are in love with someone, you may forget that you are still human and will eventually break up with them due to your feelings.
If you were in love with someone, then why would you want to stay together? Why would you care about their happiness?
You wouldn’t!
However, when you are in love with someone, you become completely oblivious to other things. For example, you might think that you’re going through hell because they aren’t attracted to you anymore. Or maybe they don’t like your personality anymore. Maybe they hate your jokes or whatever else makes them laugh nowadays.
But the thing is, you are not in love with them anymore. You never were. You were just in love with the idea of being in love with them. Unless you’re a sociopath who doesn’t feel love to begin with, you wouldn’t really want to break up with someone because you don’t love them anymore. You only broke up with them because you realized that they were unattractive or unlikable.
The truth is, you were never really in love with them in the first place. You just thought that you were.
When you are in love with someone, you won’t care about who they truly are inside. All you will do is try to rationalize every little thing they do. Even if they come off as a complete and total jacka*s, you will find some way to make yourself believe that they aren’t.
You will block everything out and try to shut off your feelings. Even if they don’t love you back, you will stay with them forever and ever and hope that one day, your feelings for each other will come back. You won’t want to be friends or acquaintances with them. You’ll want something more. You’ll want everything more.
When you fall in love with someone, you lose yourself completely.
Sources & references used in this article:
Loving someone in particular by B Bagley – Ethics, 2015 – journals.uchicago.edu
Loving someone who has dementia: How to find hope while coping with stress and grief by P Boss – 2011 – books.google.com
Delusional loving by MV Seeman – Archives of General Psychiatry, 1978 – jamanetwork.com
Loving someone with borderline personality disorder: How to keep out-of-control emotions from destroying your relationship by SY Manning – 2011 – books.google.com
Loving someone gay by DH Clark – 2009 – books.google.com
Experiences of falling in love by A Aron, DG Dutton, EN Aron… – … of Social and Personal …, 1989 – journals.sagepub.com
Love and limerence: The experience of being in love by D Tennov – 1998 – books.google.com
