How to Release Angry Feelings
What Is Repressed Anger?
Why Do People Have Repressed Anger?
Repression of anger is a way of dealing with feelings that are difficult to face or express. It is a psychological defense mechanism which helps us not to experience unpleasant emotions. When we feel angry, we may try not to show our anger outwardly, but inwardly we may continue feeling angry. For example, if someone insulted us in front of others, we might suppress our negative feelings by saying something like “I’m just being sarcastic.” Or, if someone was mean to us when we were little, we may try not to show it because we think: “If I say anything now they’ll hurt my feelings”.
In some cases repressed anger is a normal response to stressful situations. However, in other cases it indicates a problem with your relationship with yourself. If you have repressed anger for years, then it is possible that you do not really feel angry at all. You may even believe that you don’t deserve to be happy.
The good news is there are ways to deal with your repressed anger. Here’s what you need to know about how to release pent up anger:
1) First of all, realize that your feelings are valid and true.
They’re just suppressed for one reason or another.
2) Next, realize that you cannot repress anger forever, and the reason for this is that when people try to do so they end up feeling a lot of inner conflict.
In other words, you need to learn how to deal with your pent-up feelings in a healthy manner.
3) For example, you may become upset at one of your friends.
Sources & references used in this article:
Emotions in negotiation: How to manage fear and anger by RS Adler, B Rosen, EM Silverstein – Negotiation journal, 1998 – Springer
Anger management or anger expression: Which is most effective? by CW LeCroy – Residential Treatment for Children & Youth, 1988 – Taylor & Francis
Getting mad but ending up sad: The mental health consequences for African Americans using anger to cope with racism by CT Pittman – Journal of Black Studies, 2011 – journals.sagepub.com
The relations of emotionality and regulation to children’s anger‐related reactions by N Eisenberg, RA Fabes, M Nyman… – Child …, 1994 – Wiley Online Library
Anger, catharsis, the reformulated frustration-aggression hypothesis, and health consequences. by WA Lewis, AM Bucher – Psychotherapy: Theory, Research, Practice …, 1992 – psycnet.apa.org
Coping and anger by EJ Murray – Stress and coping, 1985 – books.google.com