7 Ways to Shut the Door on Self-Hate:
1) You Can’t Change What’s Not Your Fault:
“You can’t change what isn’t your fault.” – Albert Einstein
Self-hate is a common phenomenon among all human beings. There are many reasons why someone might feel this way. Some of them include:
You’re not good enough or smart enough to succeed in life. You don’t have any positive qualities. You lack confidence and are afraid of failure.
You think you deserve better than others do because you’re different from other people.
The first two reasons are understandable, but they aren’t really true at all!
If it wasn’t for these things, then how come you would still harbor such negative feelings? Why do you keep feeling bad about yourself even after you’ve tried everything else?
In order to truly overcome self-hate, one must accept their own limitations and stop blaming others for them. They need to realize that they aren’t perfect just like everyone else is. No matter how hard they try, there will always be something wrong with them. The only way they can improve themselves is to work on their weaknesses, but self-loathing gets in the way of this. If you’re able to make peace with your faults and failings you should be able to move past them.
There is no such thing as an inherently good or bad person. Instead, there are people who do good things and people who do bad things. It’s easier to blame yourself when something goes wrong rather than accepting that it was someone else’s fault.
After all, we humans always make mistakes!
2) You Can’t Control What Happens to You:
“You can’t control what happens to you, but you can control how you react to it.” – Dennis Terry
You can’t control the things others say or do. You can only control your own thoughts and actions in response to them. Stop worrying about what others think of you or what they say behind your back.
Too much stress and anxiety can lead to mental breakdowns or physical illness. It’s better to focus on what you can change rather than wasting energy on the things you can’t.
Maybe you feel like the world is against you. It’s natural to feel this way sometimes. However, the world doesn’t care about you at all.
It doesn’t care if something bad happens to you, so why should you care if something bad happens to it?
You need to accept that every person makes their own destiny. Stop looking for excuses as to why your life sucks and accept the fact that you could do something about it.
After all, you wouldn’t be reading this article if you were completely satisfied with your life, would you?
3) You Can’t Please Everyone:
“You will always be the scape goat no matter what you do.” – Anonymous
Sometimes we set goals for ourselves. Sometimes those goals are to make our lives better or to help others. However, it’s almost impossible to achieve these self-imposed standards.
The world will always find a reason to blame us. There’s always going to be a naysayer no matter what we do.
Some people just don’t like you for whatever reason. Maybe you stole their boyfriend in high school.
Maybe you told your boss he was an idiot for putting you in charge of the company’s social media (who does that anyway?
). Perhaps you ruined The Phantom Menace for them when you told them Darth Vader was Luke’s father (even though he is. That’s why he’s called The Emperor, duh).
In any case, you can’t please everyone. You can’t make everyone happy. Even if you’re Mother Teresa reincarnated, there will always be people who hate you.
So why bother trying?
Do what you want and be happy with your own choices. Stop worrying about what other people think. Most of the time, they don’t even think about you at all.
Exceptions: Your friends and family will always be there for you, of course. And don’t worry, they’ll always think you’re the greatest no matter what you do. But, hey, they’re your friends and family!
4) Stop Being a Victim:
Why live your life as if the whole world is out to get you?”
– Tina Walters
Stop expecting bad things to happen. I know life has dealt you a few crappy cards, but let’s face it, you’re here and you’re still alive. Whatever bad things have happened in the past can’t be changed.
Your time would be better spent by focusing on the present and planning for the future.
Firstly, stop blaming other people for your problems. In fact, stop blaming other people entirely, because not everything is their fault. Sometimes you just have to take a long look in the mirror and accept the fact that you’re your own worst enemy.
How is this going to help me?
It’s not going to completely solve your problems, but it’ll make you feel a whole lot better about yourself in the long run. Also, when people see that you’re no longer a whiny little victim, they’re going to stop taking advantage of you.
Now go out there and take life by the horns!
Join me next time when I talk about how to avoid being depressed in the modern world. Until then, I’m The Quizmaster and whether you like it or not, you must participate in my next quiz!
The Quizmaster’s Final Score:
You are The Fool!
“You are the eternal optimist. You’d rather run away than face your problems, but you’re probably too stupid to realize this.”
Easy there Quizmaster, I know exactly what I’m doing. I’m trying to make you look docile and boring. Easy to ignore.
– The Fool
Get your own answers!:
Totally didn’t see that one coming.
The fool? Really?
That doesn’t sound like me at all! I mean sure, I did get my butt kicked in front of a whole tavern, but I’m not an “optimist”, I’m… actually I have no idea what you mean. Guess we should have been paying more attention in English class. Oh well, I still got 21 questions right out of 30, that’s not too bad!
Or is it?
Go ahead and try it yourself and let us know how you do in the comments! And if you got a different result, let us know what it was in the comments too!
Sources & references used in this article:
Sexual anorexia: Overcoming sexual self-hatred by PJ Carnes – 2009 – books.google.com
A Glimpse of Jesus: The Stranger to Self-Hatred by B Manning – 2010 – books.google.com
After the Ball: How America Will Conquer It’s Fear and Hatred of Gays in the 90’s by M Kirk, H Madsen – 1989 – commons.wikimannia.org
Richard III: Self-hatred at loose in the world by JD Noshpitz – International Journal of Applied Psychoanalytic Studies, 2010 – pep-web.org
Black self-hatred: Regaining self-worth–From decolonisation towards reconciliation in South Africa–A practical theological appraisal by ME Baloyi – Theologia Viatorum, 2020 – theologiaviatorum.org
Between Nostalgia and Self-Hatred: The Problem of Identity in Cynthia Ozick’s The Shawl by J Partyka – Polish Journal for American Studies, 2017 – academia.edu